Iceland declares war on USA

The Icelandic government has declared war on the US. The reason officials say is the Iraq war and how it came about. It's not so much the war it self, but the idea behind it, they say.

The saga
For centuries Icelanders have been extremely violent people and have gone to war over every idea out there. At viking times they where so violent that it was hazardous to leave a viking alone in a room for more than 30 minutes, or he would beat him self to death.

The vikings gained enemies like shit attract flies. When ever a baby was born, the vikings gained a new enemy. They would have killed everyone in the world if they would have the technology and capacity to do so. They sailed to England and killed the men, raped the ugly women and stole the beautiful woman.

Viking legacy
This legacy has been carried down the family trees over the centuries. Today the violence takes on a different form. It is quite common to see a Icelander drive in his big SUV or pickup truck at violent speeds aiming for a old woman with her shopping bags. This is so common that it has become a huge problem in the capital city of Reykjavik.

Still today it is not safe to leave a child alone for more than 30 minutes or it will start to charge at the walls in the room. The youngest child to have beaten it self to death was only 1.5 years old. The legacy of the vikings is still strong in the Icelandic gene pool, so strong in fact that every weekend people gather at the center of Reykjavik for a huge all out fight. The health care system is bankrupt because of this.

Declaration of war
The prime minister of Iceland Mr. Geir H Hraði made the announcement of war in the prestigious halls of the Icelandic parliament today. In his speech he went over how every idea worth fighting for had been used over the centuries to declare war. He talked about as time had passed, fewer and fewer ideas remained unused as an excuse to go to war. He also talked about how deflation of war ideas over the centuries was a problem for the bloodthirsty people of Iceland, since they needed their violence.

The prime minister ended his speech by saying "We have great respect for the bloodthirsty Americans, they have proven them selfs as a brutal race that takes no prisoners. Over the centuries they have found many inventive ideas to go to war over. Because of they're aggressiveness, ideas worth going to war over have declined dramatically. In 2003 the Americans declared "war on terror against oil," this act was the last war-idea worth perusing, according to our research. Therefore we the Icelandic people, declare war on the USA because they have used up all the legitimate war ideas in the world."

The prime minister was later quoted saying "This is a great day for our nation."